Rules on dating my daughter
Hockey games are okay, old folks homes are better, a convent is best. I may appear to be a middle-aged, dim-witted has-been, but on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing god of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming over a rice paddy.If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. When my PTSD starts kicking in, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home.I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. As soon as you pull into driveway, you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight.
This book gives parents a window into the teen dating scene and shows them how to maintain their sanity amid all the crushes, courtships, and infatuations of adolescents.This is fine with me as long as it’s okay with my daughter.Otherwise, once you’ve gone out with my little girl you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. RULE SEVEN: As you stand in my hallway waiting for my daughter to appear, do not sigh and fidget.If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off my daughter I will remove them.RULE THREE: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off of your hips.