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As for what you should do with this guy, it sounds to me like your mind is already made up. Staying with him when your heart’s not in it is doing neither of you any favors. Just recognize that you’d actually like this guy more if he pulled away more and cared about you less. If you don’t keep on reading, I swear I won’t be upset with you.I will never know anyway 🙂 Travel, surprises, music, dancing, sports, books, last minute plans, open mind, photography, museum, craziness, spontaneity, going out (but also staying in), sharing, simplicity, respect, flip flops (yes, the sandals), down to earth (however fantasy is also very important), people, casual, word, news, work, sense of humor about yourself, awareness.The French are known for being snooty, and yet this guy takes that into consideration and pokes fun at it.He has a great sense of humor and comes off as goofy but real.wants to make me happy and for me to be his “girlfriend” and I can just tell the L word is coming along any day now. Sure everyone puts their best foot forward when they’re dating but who’s to say he’ll stay like that? Dear Diana, I can only imagine that thousands of women were reading your post and nodding along at the familiarity of your situation. Let’s break them down separately, so hopefully you can find a little clarity — or, more likely, validation, for how you feel. There has been a great deal written on this, and there’s an entire industry designed to explain to “nice guys” how to attract women.

BUT…Your independent “I don’t need anybody” attitude is counterproductive. For that to work you also need fun, interesting, stuff in common.

I speak from personal experience when I mention that I have broken up with some of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. She had everything on my checklist — smart, silly, cute, good family, stable job, etc.

What she didn’t have — what I really needed at the time — was a backbone.

I broke up with her for a woman who was like a Sex and the City character come to life. After a few months of phone calls, I flew to the East Coast to go on a four-day make-it-or-break-it date. Exactly as I pulled away from the darling girl who would have done anything for me, Miss NYC pulled away from me. This means that you’ve been married, so you don’t feel the need to do it again.

When pressed, she said I had 90% of what she was looking for – but didn’t feel the necessary attraction to start a long-distance relationship. You’ve had two kids, so you don’t hear the ticking clock.

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